Comments by Diacanu

Comment #209887 by Diacanu on July 13, 2008 at 1:23 pm

Are your teens sobbing over not getting their fill of precious nutritious life giving guns this weekend?

Paint your nipples and suckle them with Shmegalamonga!!

Now in green apple!

http://dickynoo.blogspot.com/

602. Host Desecration is Old Anti-Semitic Nonsense

Comment #209883 by Diacanu on July 13, 2008 at 1:18 pm

Y'know what flushes the magic crackers out of my desperate pleading colon?

Shmegalamonga!!!

Now with Splenda!

http://dickynoo.blogspot.com/

603. Sir John M. Templeton, Philanthropist, Dies at 95

Comment #206369 by Diacanu on July 8, 2008 at 10:10 am

Layla Nasredden-

I don't think it's appropriate to "dump" on the dead

Dump on?

Nahhh, not me.

But, I may just start drinking lots of root beer, and eating asparagus in preparation for something else.....

604. Sir John M. Templeton, Philanthropist, Dies at 95

Comment #206339 by Diacanu on July 8, 2008 at 9:36 am

95.

The fucktards always hang on so fuckin' long.

Meanwhile, the people I admire overdose or get murdered in their 30s-40's.

Is this post offensive?
Fuck it, Templeton offended me.
Why's that okay? Huh?

605. Religion's role in the climate debate

Comment #206313 by Diacanu on July 8, 2008 at 9:08 am

Is your planet warming up?
Is your civilization collapsing?
Is your species slotted for extinction within your lifetime?

Cheer up!

There's always Shmegalamonga!!

http://dickynoo.blogspot.com/

Now with no CFCs, CO2, sugar, or carbs!

Shmegalomonga, it never judges, never accuses, and is a handy-dandy substitute for love!

Religion may claim those things, but Shmegalamonga delivers!

606. Degrees of religion

Comment #206303 by Diacanu on July 8, 2008 at 8:48 am

Quetz-

Thanks. :)

607. Degrees of religion

Comment #206300 by Diacanu on July 8, 2008 at 8:41 am

Oh, and if anyone wants to keep up with the Shmegalamonga commercials, here..

http://richarddawkins.net/userComments,page1,24281

They're gems.
;)

608. Degrees of religion

Comment #206298 by Diacanu on July 8, 2008 at 8:35 am

Cartomancer-

putting your back into the job is hardly ever as effective as putting your head into it.

Agreed.
I'm experiencing similar difficulty with pimping my blog.

Putting funny commericals in every thread on the front list, while fun, and amusing to myself, is both labor intensive, and seemingly innefective.

There has to be a better, a smarter way.
Sadly, I'm just not seeing it.

Suggestions?

609. Teaching Evolution in Mexico: Preaching to the Choir

Comment #206258 by Diacanu on July 8, 2008 at 7:46 am

King of NH-

But Mexico is kicking American ass in science.

El Luchadore run off with your chimichanga?

Try Shmegalamonga!!

http://dickynoo.blogspot.com/

Made right here in the states by fat shiftless union slobs!

610. Conversation between Richard Dawkins and John Lennox

Comment #206228 by Diacanu on July 8, 2008 at 7:25 am

John Lennox giving you that riding a bicycle too slowly feeling?

Do the memories linger on, and cause you to grab the sides of your head, and fill the night with screams?

Try Shmegalamonga!!

http://dickynoo.blogspot.com/

Life need never be filled with flavorless mediocrity ever again!

Because Shmegalamonga comes in cherry, grape, and watermelon!

611. Degrees of religion

Comment #206219 by Diacanu on July 8, 2008 at 7:18 am

Religious victimhood having you break out the songbooks and violins?

Try Shmegalamonga!!

http://dickynoo.blogspot.com/

You'll still be blubbering for Jesus/Allah, but your adorable little tears will come in several lovely fruit flavors!

612. Stephen Hawking's explosive new theory

Comment #206210 by Diacanu on July 8, 2008 at 7:10 am

Are your new theories not only explosive, but painful, runny, oily, or perhaps even bloody?

Try Shmegalamonga!!

http://dickynoo.blogspot.com/

Not only will your orifices thank you, but so will your spouse/life-partner/maid/whomever cleans up after you.

613. Churches' secret talks to stop gay surge

Comment #206190 by Diacanu on July 8, 2008 at 6:53 am

Gays, need a surge in the morning?

Try Shmegalamonga!!

http://dickynoo.blogspot.com/

Works for heteros too.

Bis, you're on your own.

Just kidding, have some Shmegalamonga!

http://dickynoo.blogspot.com/

614. [UPDATED] Venomous Snakes, Slippery Eels and Harun Yahya

Comment #206180 by Diacanu on July 8, 2008 at 6:47 am

Have you got wooter all over your flagentula?

Try Shmegalamonga!

http://dickynoo.blogspot.com/

Not only will it un-wooter your flagentula, but your mitocondria will expholiate twice as fast as with the other leading brand.

Shmegalamonga!!

Because while Pharyngula may already oxydize your riboflavin, only Shmegalamonga will make you truly enjoy it.

We now return you to your regularly scheduled thread.

615. Lying for Jesus?

Comment #205250 by Diacanu on July 7, 2008 at 12:34 am

txpiper-

I'll have to respond to the rest of you tomorrow if time permits.

It won't.
*smirk*

You christians always seem to suddenly get stricken with terminally sick aunts who die multiple times, Shaq sized heaps of paperwork that fall from the sky, babies who mysteriously shit for 24 hours straight, and 72 continuous hour long gardening projects that can only be due to having to battle man eating creeper vines.

My, how your God besets you with inconvenience.

616. Christians challenge teaching of evolution

Comment #204558 by Diacanu on July 5, 2008 at 8:02 am

Well, let's see some evolutionists speaking up in churches, and see how they like that shit.

Religionists just think they have carte blank to attack everything everywhere, but they get to have their little bunker.

Bullshit.

Doesn't work that way.

They broke the gentleman's agreement between religion and science ages ago.

Time for the glove slapping.

617. Lying for Jesus?

Comment #204556 by Diacanu on July 5, 2008 at 7:53 am

txpiper-

Howcome you christians refuse to acknowlege people describing your beliefs and props as exactly what they are?

Magic books, bronze age legends, invisible sky daddy, underground fire place, invisible sky daddy's zombie son.

We use these terms as ridicule, but they're only honestly explaining by your own terms what these things are.

What, the magic won't work if you agree to these words by acknowleging them?

Tell me, would the bible still have magic if it were in Chinese, in braille, and you held it upside down, and it had pages missing?

If not, then what makes english so wonderful?

And if there's nothing particularly magic about english, then what's one more step, and decribing these things as they are?
Jesus is a zombie.
God is invisible, he lives in the sky, and he's a daddy.
The bible is supposedly magic.
Supernatural happenings are magic, why are you christians even annoyed by that word?

Seems like avoiding this language is yet another superstition.
And like all superstitions, it's irrational.

And it seems to me, by avoiding even addressing it, you can avoid facing what bullshit you actually believe in.
If you called God "invisible sky daddy", and Jesus "zombie carpenter", you'd feel silly.
So, you have to dress these concepts up in respectibility with the bullshit language of the Bible.
Or else, the magic won't work.

But, if you're reading that bullshit in english, you've already fucked the magic up, haven't you?

Unless, again, language doesn't matter.

In which case why be offended by zombie carpenter, invisible sky daddy, magic book, and puff of magic creation?

And if you're not offended, why avoid the terms?

You can't have it both ways.

And the fact remains that you christians do indeed try to have it both ways.

It's yet another hypocrisy.
And like all religion's hypocrisies, you never face them.

Plug your ears, hum, and ignore this post, and prove my point.

You humorless, oblivious, superstitious, mythology worshipper.

618. Lying for Jesus?

Comment #204550 by Diacanu on July 5, 2008 at 7:32 am

txpiper-

To me, things like that are brown spots in your ideological banana.

So what does a banana look like that has NO evidence, and the case being made with that non-evidence is outlandish magical claims from middle eastern myths?

It'd pretty much be a fully blackened empty peel on a sidewalk with ants all over it, wouldn't it?

619. Lying for Jesus?

Comment #204298 by Diacanu on July 4, 2008 at 4:23 pm

Philip1978-

Oh, don't puss out!!
Beat his ass!!
The teacup commands you!!

620. Lying for Jesus?

Comment #204271 by Diacanu on July 4, 2008 at 2:42 pm

(Posesses Philip's teacup)

Yes, you are more powerful than txpiper.
I am your one true friend. Your one true ally.
Use to me to destroy him!
I am the hammer of righteousness.
Crush him.
Use me to crush him!
Yes, yes, feel the tea flow through you!!
Breathing strength into your fists of rage!
Destroy him!!
Leave nothing to his posterity but ashes to the breeze!!
Destroy!!

(Hops out of the teacup, re-solidifies back into human form)

(Walks away with hands in pockets whistling as Philp proceeds to bludgeon Timmy Xavier senseless with his teacup)

621. Lying for Jesus?

Comment #204204 by Diacanu on July 4, 2008 at 11:44 am

txpiper-

Materialism is in and of itself a bias.

Yeah, reality does have a certain bias for it.

Like it's biased towards a blue sky, a heliocentric solar system, and objects with sufficient mass forming a gravity well.

622. Lying for Jesus?

Comment #204159 by Diacanu on July 4, 2008 at 8:51 am

Ah, Timmy's back.

He's like Jason Voorhees, or herpes.

txpiper-

You seem to think that materialist peers are a scientific supreme court. They aren't. They are just religious materialists, functioning inside the parameters of the faith, and enjoying the prestige and perks that come with being a reviewer.

Ah, yes, here we go again with this.
It's all a big conspiracy.
The evil materialists are out to destroy your faith with evil empiricism to send you to Hell.
But you'll vanquish us demons with piles and piles of bullshit from your typing fingers.

Onward christian sooo-oo-ooldier!!

Come on dude, there has to be some part of you somewhere deep under the muck that sees yourself, and knows how fucking batty you sound.

Doubting evolution because of your religious indoctrination is one thing, but supposing the biggest conspiracy in the UNIVERSE to hide the truth, and the truth being that an ice sheild melted, flooded the earth, and all the animals on the planet fit into a wooden box...come on...this really seems rational to you??

Really?

Of course you'll say yes now, but there has to be a part of you that realizes how wacko you're getting having to stack the bullshit so high to defend this worldview.

Yeah, and you'll just throw back "well, evolution is an insane blah, blah, blah..".

Well, that takes us back to Brian's challenge, fuck evolution, what else have you got for us?

Magic won't cut it.
I think by now you know why.

623. Mormons urged to back ban on same-sex marriage

Comment #203214 by Diacanu on July 2, 2008 at 1:16 pm

Wow, this thread really got away from me.

So, is Robert O'Brien still valiantly waging psychic war in the name of his imaginary friend, Jesus Herbert Christ, who doesn't need rescuing, because he's allegedly death-proof?

So much effort hurled forth by the Jesus fanclub, and yet, God supposedly doesn't need bodyguards.
You couldn't tell it from their behavior though.

One could almost laugh if it weren't such a tragic waste of human resources.

Imagine if all those braincells were being used to cure cancer.

624. Mormons urged to back ban on same-sex marriage

Comment #202701 by Diacanu on July 1, 2008 at 8:25 pm

Robert O'Brien-

Well, whatever you call the magic-weilding creature you believe in, Yahweh, Jehovah, Odin, Zeus, Sky Fairy, Big-Fuckin-Leprechaun, it's all the same, really.

A difference that makes no difference is not a difference.

625. Mormons urged to back ban on same-sex marriage

Comment #202697 by Diacanu on July 1, 2008 at 8:16 pm

Robert O'Brien-

Invisible magic weilding giants are coherant?

626. Mormons urged to back ban on same-sex marriage

Comment #202693 by Diacanu on July 1, 2008 at 8:09 pm

Robert O'Brien-

You have yet to post anything substantive,..

Now, now, stop abusing yourself in the mirror.

It ruins the fun.

627. Mormons urged to back ban on same-sex marriage

Comment #202689 by Diacanu on July 1, 2008 at 8:03 pm

Ain't it cute how the moron trolls come on here, and not only parade their stupidity, but wave it in front of them like a big dick?
But, the dick is always paper mache.
And there's never candy inside.
At least Dinesh D'souza had the decency to fill his paper mache dick full of smarties for the children.

628. Mormons urged to back ban on same-sex marriage

Comment #202683 by Diacanu on July 1, 2008 at 7:57 pm

Robert O'Brien-

No, but they do contain mathematics that would make your feeble head a-splode.

So, do any of them have a particular chapter on giant universe-poofing fairies, or, did the universe-poofing fairy tumble out of your own personal calculations?

Or, did your head a-splode, releasing all the fairies?

This an important distinction, because cleary the universe-poofing fairy crept into this whole process for you somewhere.

629. Mormons urged to back ban on same-sex marriage

Comment #202678 by Diacanu on July 1, 2008 at 7:47 pm

Robert O' Brien-

Do you have even one textbook on QM in your library? (I have several.)

Do they have illustrations by Brian Froud of the various particle fairies?

630. Mormons urged to back ban on same-sex marriage

Comment #202674 by Diacanu on July 1, 2008 at 7:43 pm

Robert O' Brien-

I do not believe in fairies...

Unless you make the fairy really big, put him up in the sky, and give him a wand big enough to poof universes into existence.

Then, it all becomes perfectly logical somehow.

I suppose it's by more of the same magic, eh?

631. Mormons urged to back ban on same-sex marriage

Comment #202667 by Diacanu on July 1, 2008 at 7:35 pm

Robert O'Brien-

If you are referring to the Bible,...

I am, and your sloppy attempt to distract from the point that you literally believe in fairy tales has failed utterly.
Nice try though.

I do not care if you are a theist because I do not care about you.

How christlike.

Jesus's fanclub, such a jolly warm hearted bunch.

632. Can't Darwin and God get along?

Comment #202639 by Diacanu on July 1, 2008 at 6:49 pm

Goldy-

Kestrel, you join forces with the religious at your peril - they want you, totally and utterly.

Exactly.

Religion doesn't want compromise, it wants its bullshit ideas to WIN.

It didn't want compromise when it had the power to try to eradicate evolution flat out.

All its so-called compromises are political smoke and mirrors.
It only "compromises", when reality forces it to fall back.

633. Can't Darwin and God get along?

Comment #202625 by Diacanu on July 1, 2008 at 5:55 pm

Oh and...

Kentrel-

...here we have someone who can offer common ground between atheists and the religious, ...

Yeah, that sounds so fucking lovely, it really does, but this isn't Coke drinkers vs. Pepsi drinkers.

It's truth vs. lies.

Religion is fake, evolution is true.

You can't drive down the middle of that street.
Pick a fucking lane, folks.
Pick a fucking lane.

634. Can't Darwin and God get along?

Comment #202623 by Diacanu on July 1, 2008 at 5:48 pm

Steve Zara-

I am afraid that at least for me, it isn't reasonable enough,

Agreed.

Bullshit wrapped in the "golly gee willikers, gang", tone of the pseudo-peacemaker is still bullshit.

635. Can't Darwin and God get along?

Comment #202621 by Diacanu on July 1, 2008 at 5:37 pm

Kentrel-

My heart bleeds for your wounded sensibilities, really.

*Rubs thumb and index finger together*

See? I'm playing the saddest song in the world on the world's smallest violin just for you.

Gut wrenching stuff, no?

Wanna hanky?
Eh?
Hanky for your boogies?

636. Can't Darwin and God get along?

Comment #202415 by Diacanu on July 1, 2008 at 1:11 pm

The title of his book should've been "mollycoddling the deluded".
A must-miss on my reading list. Right up there with "The Secret".

637. Mormons urged to back ban on same-sex marriage

Comment #201842 by Diacanu on June 30, 2008 at 10:06 am

So, I guess the answer would be D then.
:)

638. Mormons urged to back ban on same-sex marriage

Comment #201838 by Diacanu on June 30, 2008 at 10:02 am

Robert O'Brien-

Is Diacanu...

1. Lacking in native intelligence.
2. A vapid atheist.

Hey, I'm not the one using bad logic, long ago refuted arguments, and a total lack of evidence to shore up literal belief in bronze age fairy tales.

639. Mormons urged to back ban on same-sex marriage

Comment #201809 by Diacanu on June 30, 2008 at 9:34 am

I'm late to this thread, help me out here..

Is Robert O'Brien...

A. Fuckin' stupid.
B. Fulla shit.
C. Fuckin' nuts.
D. All of the above.

640. Faith schools undermined by 'Government witch hunt'

Comment #201797 by Diacanu on June 30, 2008 at 9:21 am

Apathy Personified-

You're intolerant to their intolerance!!

Persecution!! Persecution!!

641. Faith schools undermined by 'Government witch hunt'

Comment #201773 by Diacanu on June 30, 2008 at 8:53 am

Don't you just fucking love how opposing religion in any way, in any degree, no matter how shady their agenda, makes them piggy-squeal persecution?

Why, don't you know you're just supposed to roll over, and give them everything they want?

And what do they want?
Oh, just everything.
All the money, all the influence, hands on every lever, seats at every table, everyone's brains, especially sweet juicy child brains, and everyone who doesn't believe their bullshit terrorized or dead.

That's all.
Golly gee willikers it's not much.
Buncha meanies, why can't they have it?
It's persecution, I tells ya.
*Lip quiver, sniffle*

642. I believe that there is no God.

Comment #200346 by Diacanu on June 27, 2008 at 11:04 am

theIdiot-

Deuurr!!!!

Pretty much what I thought.
Marked as troll.

643. I believe that there is no God.

Comment #200339 by Diacanu on June 27, 2008 at 10:40 am

theIdiot-

So shut your ass up,...

Or you'll what, Butch?

644. Non-voters: It's all in God's hands

Comment #200336 by Diacanu on June 27, 2008 at 10:37 am

Sciros-

I think a "Batman for president" campaign needs to be promoted.

Sounds like a plan to me.

645. I believe that there is no God.

Comment #200329 by Diacanu on June 27, 2008 at 10:22 am

theIdiot-

It's really this simple, I'm good because I'm good, you're good because you fear an invisible man in the sky sending you to a pit of fire in the mantle of the earth.

You're a scumbag.

Next case.

646. Non-voters: It's all in God's hands

Comment #200328 by Diacanu on June 27, 2008 at 10:17 am

Vacingetorix-

Ah, so you agree that the system is decaying, and we're all going to die screaming and writhing?

Good, glad we're on the same page. :)

647. Non-voters: It's all in God's hands

Comment #200317 by Diacanu on June 27, 2008 at 9:49 am

Vecingetorix-

*Head pat* Yeah, that's nice, why don't I just write in Daffy Duck while I'm at it too, eh?

Now go to sleep.

648. Non-voters: It's all in God's hands

Comment #200310 by Diacanu on June 27, 2008 at 9:38 am

"It can be reasoned that if one believes God determines worldly affairs, then there is little reason for individuals to participate in civic events,"

Of course, that likely had to be translated from the patterns of moaning, drooling, slurring, and gasping from the subjects momentarily forgetting how to breathe.

649. An Interview with Prof. Richard Dawkins

Comment #200024 by Diacanu on June 26, 2008 at 4:17 pm

scotochromagen-

Hmm, don't think I've ever thought of it that way...

Non-existence being a better "place", than cancer.

Naturally, yeah.

I always thought of it as meaning the afterlife, and better than this world, period.

Good point, you've given me a new perspective to ponder.

650. Creationist critics get their comeuppance

Comment #199785 by Diacanu on June 26, 2008 at 11:02 am

Caudimordax-

Stephen Colbert.