I never really felt right when I was little. I remember being age 11 and reading a story about an Egyptian girl who’s mummy was found and they stated she most likely had her legs bitten off by a hippo. I had this big slap in the face realizing “she was alive and the same age as me, and now she isn’t anymore, and that will happen to me also.” I spent weeks terrified with my heart sinking in every time I thought about death. And I was in a heavily Roman Catholic family who made me go to Sunday school. I thought heaven and hell was an imaginary place. I really did. And didn’t see the big deal about them. I was forced to make my confirmation and at this point I began getting very angry at all of it. I wasn’t aware that there was another way of life. I thought I had no choice. I kept to myself about all of it. I was 14 then and a freshmen and I dated someone and lost my virginity to him. He did to me as well. And a few months into it he suddenly became very Christian. He broke up with me for not being the same way and then we tried to work it out and I tried for a year to be that way. I went to church and youth group with him. I hated it. It was like a cult. I met a boy sophomore year whom I fell completely in love with. I found out he was atheist and very open about it. Not long after I broke up with my boyfriend because I loved the new boy. And I told my family I was atheist also, at 15. They said that wasn’t allowed. That I’d always be catholic from being baptized that I had a mark. I’d be a fallen catholic. I insisted I had been an infant and it was against my will. I had alot of anger towards it. People told me it was a phase. I’m 20 now and finally past most of it. It took me a few years to not be afraid when someone threatens hell to me. I plan on making an atheist youtube channel. And I have a son almost a year old who’s INTACT too. And I want to show the world that atheists are kind intelligent people.